


afterglow

by miilkteas



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Angst, Asra goes through a time, Asra wonders if there was another way, Canonical Character Death, Deal with a Devil, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Loss, Other, Overthinking, Spoilers, is this loss?, neutral pronouns for apprentice, this is just kinda sad tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-30
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-09-30 17:01:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17227880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miilkteas/pseuds/miilkteas
Summary: asra struggles to cope. [ spoilers for book xiii - death, non-canonical ]





	afterglow

**Author's Note:**

> quick lil drabble i wrote a few months ago

How do you explain the ache in your chest when your heart breaks?

Asra stumbled into his shop. He scanned the familiar shelves stacked with dried plants and ingredients, the empty cushioned seats with enough silence to fill them all, the once cozy decorations that only made him feel claustrophobic in that very moment. It felt so wrong. 

In every nook and cranny, their presence remained. 

It was as if their very spirit was still in the deck of tarot cards that felt heavy in his pockets, the sheets that still lingered with their familiar scent, and the excited hisses that came from Faust. He couldn’t help but keep his eyes on the ground, unable to look at anything but the floor in fear of the tears in his eyes overcoming his rapid blinks that tried in vain to stop them. To Asra, it was as if the world was descending upon him, only the afterglow of their existence remaining, disappearing far too soon.

How long had it been since he found out? A few hours? Almost a day? Who knew (who cared, for that matter?) His heart was heavy with regret.

His dear, dear apprentice. If he closed his eyes and thought hard enough, it was like they were still there with him, not reduced to another pile of ash on the beach. The shadows in his room—their room—sometimes had him blinking once, twice, confused at the images his mind conjured. No, they were gone. 

Why was it so hard to convince himself of that?

Things felt too empty without them around. They didn’t just fill his shop; they filled Asra’s very being. The next time a customer wandered in requesting a reading, he forced himself to imagine a small, figure hovering over him, learning from his every move. When there were ingredients to be collected, he attempted to convince himself he only needed so many, as his apprentice had him covered with the other ones—surely. This sort of imagination, wishful thinking, was hopeless. But what could he do, when he didn’t know what to do with them in life, not knowing what to do with them in death. 

They existed only in his mind in his vain attempt to hold onto the afterglow of their existence. So when Lucio offered a solution, he didn’t even think before saying “yes.”   
  


**Author's Note:**

> thanks for making it down here! don't forget that i see every kudo and comment, and they really motivate me to keep posting! hope everyone has a good holiday and new year xx


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